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Avoid Unnecessary Drama Like The Plague
Do you ever feel like no matter how much you try to avoid unnecessary drama, it seems to follow you like gum stuck to your shoe? Don’t you just hate drama? I know I do. Or are you one of those drama lovers?
A self-titled drama king or queen who thrives on it? Certain people want drama.
They crave it and chase it. It makes them feel like they are better than you, worth more like they matter and are more important. They are wrong.
Last year, after finally realizing that having drama in my life is by choice, I cut ALL drama out of my life. Completely. No excuses. No exceptions. This was the only way I was able to gain peace of mind.
Naturally, this meant cutting certain people out of my life. I got so sick of being sucked into tornadoes of drama, not able to find my way out.
There are several scales for rating the strength of tornadoes, just as there are certain levels of drama. No matter the level of drama, on a scale of 1 to 10, I prefer to avoid it.
It is not only unnecessary but unproductive.
What a horrible exhausting way to waste your time and energy.
Next time you notice drama coming your way…..turn around and make a run for it – just be sure to take these tips along with you.
Don’t get sucked in!
1. Mind Your Own Business
Butt out. Keep your nose out of other people’s business. Avoid unnecessary drama by minding your own business. It is as simple as that. If it doesn’t concern you, why get involved?
Yes, we are all faced with situations where we may need to step in to offer help or solve a problem. I am in not telling you not to do so, all I am saying is, pick your battles.
If it involves issues between friends or colleagues, leave them to it, unless they ask for help or advice.
2. Don’t Take Things Personally
Guilty. Guilty. Guilty. I take things personally when my ego gets hurt.
Learning that what others say and do has nothing to do with you as a person.
I have been able to avoid unnecessary drama by realising that how people respond and react to situations is a projection of their own reality.
When you stop making yourself feel too important or feel like everything is about you, you will stop taking things too personally, and as a consequence, avoid unnecessary drama.
The world doesn’t revolve around you. Maybe it should, but since it doesn’t, so try to make the best of all situations.
3. Avoid Giving Unsolicited Advice
Leave the advice for Dr. Phil. If no one is asking for your advice, don’t offer it.
In your mind, you can think of all the ways you could solve other people’s problems.
You might even be able to solve world hunger, provide millions with a roof over their heads, change workdays to two days a week, and even bring about world peace.
Unsolicited advice can be received the right way if you are able to approach the situation from an objective perspective. If you are not sure, then it is better to keep quiet, rather than spitting words out.
Remember what I said – don’t get sucked in.
'Turn up the music, turn down the drama.'Click To Tweet
4. Stop Gossiping At All Costs
Oh but it’s so hard, isn’t it? I know, I know!
I admit it – there is no way to avoid gossip at all costs, so let’s try to box this in a little.
Complaining about someone and their treatment of you to your sister, best friend or husband is not gossiping, that’s sharing. (LOL – smile)
Talking about how Monica’s son does not look like his father, or how much time the DHL guy spends at the neighbour’s house when dropping off “packages” – now that’s gossip!
The more entertaining of the two? Yup, gossip!
Especially when you have a good gossip partner who has juicy information to tell you in return.
But what are you gaining from this?
When you’re speaking about someone negatively or gossiping, try to stop yourself and redirect the conversation.
Steer the conversation in a direction of positivity.
Speak about something worth your while and your time.
Heard a little something like this before….? “I’m no gossip, but I heard Katie tell Mark and Johnny that she overheard Michelle and Sandra telling Abby’s sisters’ husband that their Aunt’s stepmom’s sister was dating her bisexual boss’ brother who is 32 younger that she is!”
Hmmmmmmm……Be careful who you gossip with. Avoid unnecessary drama.
“If they do it with you, they’ll do it to you”. Click To Tweet
5. You Are Responsible For You
Do you honestly want to avoid unnecessary drama in your life?
Take responsibility for your actions. No one has control over you. We often give in to the negativity of others for acceptance and approval.
Do not lose your personal power. You are not responsible for someone else’s feelings and they aren’t responsible for yours.
Always respond to drama rather than reacting to it. Be the bigger person.
'Take the high-road, there’s less traffic up there.'Click To Tweet
Drama has a way of sneaking into your life even after applying these tips.
The way you deal with it and get rid of it is key.
Using these five tips will help you avoid unnecessary drama and minimize the amount you have to deal with.
Stick to a NO DRAMA policy. Do not tolerate it. Do not create it. Do not spread it.
Life is about love, empathy and support. Make happiness is a habit and cultivate it.
How do you deal with drama? Do you avoid it at all costs?
What ways do you deal with dramatic people and situations? Kindly share them with me in the comments section below.
62 comments
I love to mind my business almost all the time, thankfully, I was brought up that way…..that has saved me from trouble than cause same. Thanks for sharing
My problem is, I always take things personally. I have got to stop doing that.
I have eliminated a lot of people out of life due to their drama. I don’t have time for drama nor dealing with drama queen. No matter what you do they will not hear you . So the best thing to do is get rid of them and ignore .
I absolutely love this. It is so true.. I try to do all of these things but I have to say that I struggle with accepting the fact that I am only responsible for myself! I cannot control everything!
I can think of a lot of people I need to send this article to! They just don’t get the hint but some people thrive on drama. As a Mom I avoid it like the plague. Just focusing on me and my kid is enough to deal with haha!
Yes! Great post! Advice for _EVERYONE_. Life is too short for nonsense!
There a girl who I use to be friend with, we used to work together and we came ‘bestie’. And oh my god! That girl was drama filled electric. Every time I’d see her it be nothing but drama. It was drama with her boyfriend, her mum, her college, her car, etc – you get the picture. At first I felt sorry for her but everyday brought in new drama, so much so that i got sick to death of it. She be creating drama not just in RL – but online as well – especially with drama attention seeking status.
I got so tired with it, even my husband got bored with it. That I eventually cut tied with her – well she cut tied with me as she moved away and didn’t bother to tell me, some ‘friend’ aye.
So moral of the story is, don’t get plunge down with people attention seeking drama and avoid making friend with those kind of people. It doesn’t help anyone. xx
I always try to avoid drama. As much as possible so maybe that’s why I have lesser friends and fewer people know me. You’ve given some good tips here and I have tried to follow them. I have cut one major person in my life and it’s the biggest change I’ve ever made.
It’s definitely a good piece of advice to concentrate on your own business and not to take things too seriously or personally. i think it’s not too difficult to avoid drama – it just takes some consideration and keeping calm on htings you can’t really do anything.
Hello Sheri
I totally agree with you on this. I think there is a lot of stuff to deal with today in life. We need to be peaceful in order to prepare for a better tomorrow. Drama and dramatic people are a big no-no
I personally hate drama, but surprisingly I saw some people who seem to LOVE it (what a pity…) I completely agree with you and I think put these advice into practice shouldn’t be difficult for anyone. Great advice!
Se manifique! such brilliant insight and advice shared!!! Point 3 resonated with me the most, so many people try to give out advice when no one asked for it. either they like the sound of their own voice or are of the opinion that their advice is both great and warranted…
More people needta realize this and evolve from it.
Thank you for raising awareness on this.
I totally avoid being involved in any kind of drama because it just leads to stress and nothing else, although some people love it and handle it very well. I have stopped taking things personally because they are just something that spoils the mood.
I think the most important is: “Don’t take things personally”.
Quoted: “Don’t take anything personally! Nothing others do is because of you. What others say and do is a projection of their own reality, their own dream. When you are immune to the opinions and actions of others, you won’t be the victim of needless suffering.” – “The Four Agreements” by Don Miguel Ruiz
Great advice! It can definitely be hard to reduce toxic relationships and remove drama from your life. I’ll have to keep all these tips in my back pocket 🙂
We can’t get anything good from having unnecessary drama in our life. It will only messednus out. Not unless the drama is something beneficial, such as giving you source of huge income, then that’s okay.
Hahahahaha! Like those drama reality stars! Have a good day Blair!
What a helpful post! I don’t have time for any drama, negativity and so on. Life’s too short to waste my tame on it, so I try to avoid negative people and drama kings/queens the best I can.
A great way to put it. I’m also not a drama-tolerator! But then it’s hard because I tend to take things personally — criticism, other people’s behavior, and not liking me. AT the end of the day, it pays to be empathetic and say, “people are doing their best. be kind”.
I totally agree with everything you just listed here.. I just hate dealing with drama at home (although I can’t deny the fact that sometimes, I am also at fault for being too emotional lol). Also it is very ideal to surround yourself with positive people
I’m a huge advocate for “minding your own business” it just makes life much easier when you focus on yourself.
I hate drama but I always seem to end up in the middle of it and its because I stick my nose in when I should just stay out of it!
What you have enumerated are so agreeable and on point! So hard to do number 2. Even if you try to let it out of your system through the other ear, some just get left behind and sting your for quite a while. I’ve been dealing with that feeling for months and the only way I could move forward was to accept the fact that those aren’t true and just slowly ignore and move on. Cause I know, I can do better. 🙂
I agree with you in all single points! Mainly at work but also in personal life I often bump into self complaining people always so focused on issue that could be so easily solved with no much efforts.
When it comes to personal and private life it’s hard to me not to be overwhelmed by this kind of drama queens/kings
you have NO idea how much I can relate to this post! The unsolicited advice is a big one for me, it really frustrates me at times. I once had some woman I was Friends with inform me on a near daily basis that “I didn’t eat!” She didn’t live with me and I ate a lot actually but i’d cut out junk food and was exercising more so I’d lost some weight. But she kept telling me I needed to eat a burger! It’s rude and condescending! Great post! Nobody needs that kind of drama in their life!
Whoa! Isn’t that so annoying? I mean, making assumptions is one thing, but going to a person and making those statements as if they are known facts is quite another. She needs to read this post, LOL.
too much drama in our life only gives as anxiety, stress and lots of wrinkles! I would like to enjoy life with less drama.
Love love love your post, I love it because everything you discussed is so true. It only takes so much energy of us when gossiping, it really isn’t necessary.
I love this post…I really need to follow your advice..I am going to bookmark this and go back to it You are spot on with everything!!!!
Have to stop doing all of these Specially the first one.
I have attacks of I -can -save -the -world syndrome.That gives me a load of heartache.Avoid drama.Really its a time sucker
This is very true! And i couldn’t agree more. You see there are people who invest their time in gossip and putting their nose on someone else’s book. Then they get irritated and insecure turning things back to themselves and they get troubled. Not a good idea.. i always believe that we are responsible for our own dysfunction..
In my opinion it is most important to think before you speak! That can already save you so much drama
I agree completely Maikel. Silence is golden – unless you have kids 🙂
I definitely love this article! Before I was sooooo sensitive about things hence life was full of drama. I’m guilty of taking things personally often. I’m just glad that as I grow older, I learn not to literally mind all things.
P.S.
I really like this line:
“Next time you notice drama coming your way…..turn around and make a run for it”
All good points some drama is unavoidable especially in a work place not gossip per se but just drama nonetheless. But you’re right I like to mind my own business and not offer up unsolicited advise
I need to practice not taking things personal. I do pretty good staying out of drama but try to minimize it with my kids.
Omg love this!!! I swear people take things way to seriously these days!
This year i did the same, i cut some people out of my life who were basically no good and goodness i feel so much better, love this post totally agree with everything 🙂
Great advice, especially for the holidays! Leading a low stress life is priceless.
Beth
I am so guilty of not avoiding unnecessary drama, but I just find that to try to bring peace to myself I am constantly working on learning how to set and enforce personal boundaries. I am working on learning how to say no and to not feel guilty to stay out of someone’s business and take care myself. It can be a process for those who are used to being around constant drama!
I don’t like drama. So if I can avoid it: Yes, please! Don’t things personally is an important tip. Yes, I sometimes do it. And it’s quite hard not to take some things personally and keep thinking about it. And the last one is a good reminder as well. It all starts with what we do ourselves.. I totally agree.
I just realized too that drama is so toxic. Haha. I hate it. I dont want to be with people who can only say negative things and only knows how to see what’s bad in another person. This article should be read by people who havent realized yet how life can be so light without drama.
Oh gosh, I want to send this article to all of my co-workers. Hahaha. It’s definitely a culture thing though. Here, in eastern TN, in a small town, everyone’s business is everyone’s business.
It usually is that way in a small town Divya. Also, there is usually one person in the town who can spread news faster than CNN. 🙂
What a lovely entry! I’m pretty sure people start to “adult” once they follow all your pieces of advice here. 😉 I myself, is in the process of cutting unnecessary drama in my life, cutting out harmful ties with people who don’t really care, and just focusing on improving myself and surrounding myself with positive vibes. BUT be sure not to be too individualistic nor stoic/indifferent. 😉 Just a friendly reminder. 🙂 I think you will find the short film “The Swedish Theory of Love”. Please watch when you have the time. 😉
Great post with some wonderful tips! Thank you for sharing these 🙂
true – minding our own business is the best way to avoid drama. Maybe already with your own life you get so much drama, others’ is unnecessary
Sorry for commenting so late I wanted to take some time with your article, since it´s an interesting and senstive topic, which I definitely should take to heart.
The part I have to work the most for is point five. It´s so hard for me to relax and be more chilled. I´m constantly tense.
all points so reflect towards me…I think I will Have to soon work upon your advice to get out of this…
Such relevant advice as America continues to be polarized following the election results. I’ve tried to stay off of social media so I can avoid the hate and bashing.
I hate drama and I don’t watch drama series either movie or a TV series, I just don’t know why, but not really a big fan of it. I like how positive you are about this one, truly well written. This is likewise a big help to everyone to clear their mind and find their peace. This is truly something to ponder and must bear in mind.
LaiAriel
I don’t like drama as well in my life. I once took a personality exam and based on the analysis, I am an avoider of drama and conflicts. I forgot the specific term for that exam though. The best line here really is ‘Mind Your Own Business” and I am glad you chose it as the first point. Thank you for sharing.
Great tips, which – to be honest – should be common sense for every grown up person.
Nevertheless it is always good to remind important things, to be aware of them and appreciate, so thats why I enjoyed reading your post 🙂
Thank you a lot for sharing your ideas and experiences!
I agree with you Hendrik, unfortunately drama occurs more and more nowadays because common sense is no longer so common. 🙂
I completely agree with you.
Sometimes there are situations that you are pulled into the center of the proverbial storm. But there is always a better way of handling things without getting personal. In fact, even if others get too personal with you, stick to being non-personal.
Emotion is a bad decision maker. Letting emotion purely control the thought process is what gets people in more trouble.
You are so right Robert. Emotion is a bad decision maker. Be it for good or for bad. It is always better to be rational and have different perspectives rather than going by emotions alone.
This is so true that’s what i had to do. It was hard but i have only a few friends and i barley talk to anyone and that’s fine for me lol im drama free and have been since this year!!!!!
I avoid drama by choosing my friends very carefully and have only good hearted, positive people around me. Sometimes things happen but like you said, it’s important to not let the drama or gossip escalate.
Yes Karoliina – choosing friends carefully is so important to growth and self development. Not to talk of avoiding unnecessary drama.
I always remove any unnecessary drama from my life. Life is far too short for that!
I agree with you 100% Jemma!
Oh nothing worse than people sticking their nose in my things and giving me unwanted advices. Great article 🙂